Nanny 911

I was on my out of Albertson's yesterday. It was our second stop for the morning. My kids were done. I was done. Jackson went running to the car, opened the door and quickly shut it in his sister's face. Ella starts screaming. I'm telling Jack he needs to open the door. He says he can't. I go to put Brenton in his car seat and he starts screaming. Mean mom, I won't let him ride in the car without being in his car seat. Lovely. This all is happening as the lovely lady from Albertson's is helping me out to the car. At this point she says, "looks like we need to call Nanny 911!" Wow. Really? Am I that bad?

It had been a crazy morning. We had stopped at Target before this and ended up being there way too long. Waiting on prescriptions. Perusing the isles. Way too long. I had decided to get one of those really long carts with the two seats for kids. My kids always beg for these and since Brenton is now able to unlock the child belt in the cart, I thought if he was lower to the ground he would be safer. My kids were crazy in Target. Brenton continuously got out of his seat and ran around the aisles. I was one of those moms. You know, the ones you look at and think to yourself that they need to control their children. The one who should probably just have left. The one who should have just gotten what she came for, prescriptions and contact solution. Nope, not me. I kept on trucking.

I was thinking about this last night. I used to be told that I have such beautiful children. That they were so well behaved. Seriously. I would get told this every time I went to the store. I'm pretty sure I haven't been told that in awhile. You know what I realized? I'm just too tired to care. As I walk around the store, I just don't care. As long as they are not hurting each other or themselves, I'm good. As long as they're not disturbing other shoppers, I'm good. As long as they're not ripping things off the shelves, I'm good. I'm too tired to care if they're screaming. If they throw a fit, I just ignore it. So, for all those times that you've given a mom a sideways glance, just remember, she's probably just tired. Maybe she hasn't been sleeping well. Maybe she's a bit stressed. Give the mom a smile and a break. Tell her you've been there. Sympathize. Please. It might just be me your giving the glance to.

The day didn't get a whole lot better once we got home. Kids were still crazy. I was still crabby. Caden got home from school and off the boys went to play a few video games. An hour later it was time to clean up. An hour is good. Plenty of time to play. Caden, however, did not think so. He didn't want to clean up. He still wanted to play. He threw a nice little fit, tossed the video console on the floor and proceeded to get grounded from video games for a week. Fun times. At this point he tells me he is no longer my boy. He is Daddy's boy. He is not Mommy's boy. Wow. Feel the love?

Thankfully, bedtime came. The kids were all washed and snug in there beds. While visions of sugarplums... oh wait, sorry. Wrong poem. As I'm tucking Caden in, he gives me a big hug, looks at me with those big blues and says he misses snuggling. It's been awhile. I promised we would get snuggles after school the next day and all was good. Guess he's still my boy after all.

I layed in bed last night processing the day. Thankful that God got me through the day. Thankful that the day was over. Thankful that as the kids and I went in and out of the stores that the pouring down rain missed us. I woke up to pouring down rain yesterday and seriously did not want to go anywhere. I did not want to get soaked with kids in tow. I cried, not wanting to do the day. But, I went and the Lord was good. He parted the clouds and we stayed dry. I know he was watching out for me.

I'm reading Psalms right now. Two nights ago I got to Psalm 119. What a great Psalm. Reminding me to stay strong in the word. To learn more about God's truth. So that on days when life seems crazy. When life seems to be too overwhelming, I can cling to God and His truth. I can cling to the fact that He loves me. Me. In all my sin and messed up exhaustion. He loves.

Last night I felt completely exhausted and drained. As I read I came upon this verse, "My soul clings to the dust; Revive me according to your word. I have declared my ways, and You answered me; teach me Your statutes. Make me understand the way of Your precepts; So shall I meditate on Your wonderful works. My soul melts from heaviness; Strengthen me according to Your word." Psalm 119:25-28. So as I felt myself melting, I started meditating on His wonderful works... my family, my friends, my God.

My children, who so drove me crazy yesterday, are wonderful works. They are blessings. Gifts. God has trusted us to raise these beautiful children. So as they drive me crazy, I'm trying to cling to His goodness. They are "fearfully and wonderfully" made. Cole is such a sweetheart. As Cory tried to tackle me last night, Cole was the first to come to my rescue. He was trying to protect me and keep Cory from tickling me. Caden is my tender hearted boy. He wears his heart on his sleeve. He loves a good snuggle. Jackson is enthusiastic. He loves to help. All I have to do is ask if he wants to help and he's game. Okay, not always. Usually. He is always good for a big hug and a huge laugh. Ella is my sweet princess. She leaned over to me at the table 2 nights ago, wrapped her arms around my neck and said, "I love you my beautiful Mommy". We are best friends. At least for now. Brenton is my joy. He loves to hold my hand. He loves to make people smile. He is a cheese. He too, is always good for a huge laugh. God has made these children so perfectly. Just because I'm tired and worn out doesn't mean they are any less perfect.

God gave me a verse a few months ago. He spoke to me in my language. He made me laugh out loud. "For You are my lamp, O Lord; The Lord shall enlighten my darkness, For by You I can run against a troop; By my God I can leap over a wall. As for God, His way is perfect; The word of the Lord is proven; He is a shield to all who trust in Him. For who is God, except the Lord? And who is a rock, except our God? God is my strength and power. And He makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of deer, And sets me on my high places. He teaches my hands to make war, So that my arms can bend a bow of bronze. You have also given me the shield of Your salvation; Your gentleness has made me great. You enlarged my path under me; So my feet did not slip... For you have armed me with strength for the battle...The Lord lives! Blessed be my Rock! Let God be exalted, the Rock of my salvation!... He is the tower of salvation to His king. And shows mercy to His anointed," 2 Samuel 22: 29-37, 40, 47, 51

When God said troop, I laughed. I call my kids my troop. My clan. God spoke right to my heart. I know that by God, I CAN run against my troop. I will cling to His words. Thank you Lord for your truth to cling to when I feel my soul melting into the dust. The you for your wonderful works.