Seriously

A friend of mine recently told me that seriously is my word. Apparently, I say it a lot. I do. I say it in everyday conversation with friends, family and God. Seriously.

When I think about it, I say it for many different reasons. If something good happens? Seriously is said with excitement. If something bad? Not as much excitement, more of a question... you've got to be kidding me. When I say it to God, it's usually as I'm stomping up the stairs, throwing a fit and wondering just what kind of mess I'm about to meet. Seriously speaking, it's my way of throwing a tantrum with few words. It's often followed by an "I quit". Nice.

Seriously. Can you imagine someone asking God, "seriously?" and following it up with an "I quit". What a grateful daughter of God I am. I wonder if it frustrates God. I wonder if it makes Him sad. I wonder if He laughs at how ridiculous I am. I wonder if He's just glad that I'm talking to Him. I wonder.

Truly, I would NEVER want to quit this job. Sure there are moments where it's tempting. I seriously remember the first time I wanted to quit. I was VERY pregnant with Jackson. Caden was 2. I had a great idea to stop by and visit with my Mom and have lunch with her. I made Caden what he wanted for lunch, set it down in front of him, and then something very unexpected happened. He threw a fit! I gave him what he wanted and he threw a fit. Well, hormones were raging, I was tired and wanted nothing to do with his fit. I packed him up in the car... well, I tried. As I went to put him in the car seat, he arched his back (one of my least favorite things that a child can do) and screamed louder than I had heard him scream. Ever. He continued screaming as we drove down the road. He's screaming. I'm crying. I turned the music up as loud as I could just trying to drown out his screams. I called Cory and said, "I quit. I don't like my job right now and I would just like to quit."

Obviously, this is not a job I can quit. Obviously, I would never want to quit. There are way too many reasons not to. God has blessed me far more than I deserve. He has loaned me these beautiful children. He has trusted me to raise them. I love my "job" most of the time. I wouldn't trade it for anything. There are just times that I would like to escape to Mexico... I'd even take hiding under the covers.

Unfortunately, I don't get to escape all that often, but I am able to run to God. I get to throw my fits, talk to Him, and ask Him to carry my load. Maybe He does like my fits. Seriously. It's in those moments when I NEED to cling to Him. I don't have an option... well, I do, but I don't. If I expect to make it through, it will only be done by Him. I do not have it in me. I just don't. I'm not superhuman or supermom. I NEED God to make it through.

I'm sure that at the very moment I'm stomping up the stairs that God is throwing His arms wide open. Getting ready for me to run into His arms. Getting ready for me to talk to Him. Getting ready to guide me through. Thank you God. Thank you Father. Thank you Daddy. Thank you for opening your arms wide. Thank you for putting up with my fits. Sorry that it often takes a fit for me to crawl into your lap. Thanks for loving me anyway. I love you too!! Seriously.

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On another note, I got 2 bloggy awards yesterday. Crazy! My friend Shannon gave me this

She said she gave it to me because, "she is so good about taking what's going on in her life and being reflective about it in a way that encourages other people to do the same" Thanks Shannon! It means a lot to me that you walk away encouraged!

The rules for the Encouraged Blogger Award are:1. The winner may put the logo on their blog.2. Put a link to the person who sent you the award.3. Nominate 5 blogs.4. Put links to their blogs.5. Leave a message for your nominees.

So, I'm nominating...

Krista over at From One Crazy Mommy Krista and I have been friends since our freshman year in college. She is an amazing friend and a wonderful Mommy. I got to meet her 2 kiddos in October and loved every minute of it. Krista is authentic. Krista is encouraging. She is amazing. I am always guaranteed a good laugh when I talk to her and I am always guaranteed to feel encouraged. I am so thankful for her and her friendship.

Amy over at Dawdlebug Diaries Amy is like a sister to me. I cherish our friendship. Our friendship is one in which pretty much anything can be said. We don't have to agree on everything... and we don't. But, we do support each other. I can call her on the worst of days and she will give me a sympathetic ear. She will pray for me. She encourages me. She will tell me I'm doing a good job. She is a wonderful friend. She is a blessing.

Meleea over at This Mosaic Life Meleea is an amazing friend to have. She is authentic. She is prayerful. She is wise. She is... you guessed it, encouraging. She can tell when you are not okay. She knows when you need prayer or a listening ear. She too, is a blessing.

Dee over at Ashes For Beauty I first met Dee on Easter Sunday 3 1/2 years ago. We were both up in the nursing mother's room during the service. I mentioned that Ella was my miracle baby... conceived as a surprise when we didn't think it was possible. She told me Autumn was her miracle baby. Conceived after YEARS of not getting pregnant. We hit it off right away. We may not talk often, but every conversation is a blessing. She is wise. She is caring. She is encouraging...

Emily over at Really Living I've never met Emily. I found her while blog hopping one day. I love her blog because while I've never been through her experience, she writes in a way that anyone can grow. She seems to be an amazing daughter of God. Her blog is my daily devotional. I am always touched by what she has to say. I am so thankful to have stumbled across her blog!

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Cassandra also gave me an award yesterday. She gave me this

It means this... This blog invests and believes the PROXIMITY - nearness in space, time and relationships! These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in prizes or self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers! Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.

And because this award already has such a great explanation, I'm just listing my 8. Here they are...

Audrey at BooMama

Trish at It's My Crazy Life and I Love It

Shannon at Eightcrazy

Lee Ann at One Day at A Time

Eryn at 5 by Faith

A Thorn Among Roses

Julie at Through My Eyes

Mara at Masters Moments

I'm so thankful for the friendships I have and those that are forming through blogland. As I've said before, I love that we can all be blessed by others' blogs. I continue to pray that God will continue to reign victoriously over this great form of communication.